We've all been there, wanting to find that neverland. I guess I've been in that spot for a few weeks now. Not only because I miss the old life also because I've lost my purpose or my way so to speak.
Why am I doing what I'm doing, will anybody notice my mark in history and do I even make a change in the world by being just me.

This all sounds so depressing I know, but I guess you'll just have to get used to it for some time.

Let me tell you guys about my week so far: I've finally begun picking up what I left behind concerning my math, just today I and my geocaching-buddy Simon finished our multi-cache.

So yeah I should be as happy as the next guy, I've got three meals a day, a bed to sleep in, rood over my head but for some reason I don't have a connection to anything in this world...

Well enough of my ranting for tonight, besides I'm guessing the ones who read this are getting tired of me and my complaining x)

Aw well Goodnight guys ;)

"Don't be afraid your life will end; be afraid that it will never begin." - Grace Hansen
Things That Matter - Rascal Flatts

Since I gave you guys some of my thoughts about a game last time. It's now time for my usual boring, serious and complaining self to have a spot in the light.

lately I've been feeling that everything I decide to do just aren't available once I really want it.

Tonight I'm actually going to write the first things that comes to my mind starting now.

I don't want to be here!!
I hate you all!
Grow up, I mean seriously you're both adults and can't even cooperate with each other at the most simplest things.

I am nobody and I don't mean nobody as in not famous or powerful I mean as the guy who just melts in the background of your daily life basis.

I just want a month where things are going my way!
Just a month would make me stronger and let me carry on for at least ten years..

Now doesn't it sound really good to have your own fortress of solitude? Maybe not for most people, a year ago I would've hated being alone. A year ago I had gotten used to the idea of being alone after almost four years of loneliness.

Now these days I can't go without human contact for even 36 hours, I'm starting to wonder if I'm maybe pathetic, relying too much on other humans. Lately I've been feeling such despise, detest and hatred towards those around me... Or maybe I've always had it just never really had my eyes and mind open as much as now.

Sure there are great things in my life which I probably take for granted, but come on after almost ten years of adversity I'm starting to grow tired of it.

Quote - "-I'm hanging out in a graveyard, does that strike as normal behaviour to you?
- Hey I'm here too!
- Yeah, good point."

Into Each Life Some Rain Must Fall - Ella Fitzgerald & The Inkspots.