Since I gave you guys some of my thoughts about a game last time. It's now time for my usual boring, serious and complaining self to have a spot in the light.

lately I've been feeling that everything I decide to do just aren't available once I really want it.

Tonight I'm actually going to write the first things that comes to my mind starting now.

I don't want to be here!!
I hate you all!
Grow up, I mean seriously you're both adults and can't even cooperate with each other at the most simplest things.

I am nobody and I don't mean nobody as in not famous or powerful I mean as the guy who just melts in the background of your daily life basis.

I just want a month where things are going my way!
Just a month would make me stronger and let me carry on for at least ten years..

Now doesn't it sound really good to have your own fortress of solitude? Maybe not for most people, a year ago I would've hated being alone. A year ago I had gotten used to the idea of being alone after almost four years of loneliness.

Now these days I can't go without human contact for even 36 hours, I'm starting to wonder if I'm maybe pathetic, relying too much on other humans. Lately I've been feeling such despise, detest and hatred towards those around me... Or maybe I've always had it just never really had my eyes and mind open as much as now.

Sure there are great things in my life which I probably take for granted, but come on after almost ten years of adversity I'm starting to grow tired of it.

Quote - "-I'm hanging out in a graveyard, does that strike as normal behaviour to you?
- Hey I'm here too!
- Yeah, good point."

Into Each Life Some Rain Must Fall - Ella Fitzgerald & The Inkspots.